Why I Rise - Part 33

"I experienced violence from my mom until I was 21. I saw my step-dad and my mom fighting, where she will end up in the hospital. I intervened every single time to separate them. I took the baby many times, my half-brother from those scenes, so he wouldn't experience seeing domestic violence. Because of my own experiences, I rise with a One Billion Rising because I am a peacemaker and there is something more powerful than a fits, a kiss, a hug a good friend.."

--

Sonia Quiroga Thomas Olanova, is a refashion support for women. Ola means wave in Spanish and for us movement, making big waves, and nova in Latin means "new" but also is the brighest and the one that contains the most energy in the universe, creating super-novas. For us, in other words, is a new fashion movement that supports women with their business. We have a beautiful Olanova Recycling Pencil Skirt, Olanova T-shirt Local Made and the refashion pieces. For every clothes that we sell, Olanova gives the money to womenpreneur in need. If you donate your clothes to us, we will refashion it and make it from it something beautiful, something new. Olanova, gives you the opportunty to feel good on our clothes and do good a the same time by helping another women in need.

Why I Rise - Part 30

In 1988, a 7-year-old boy was riding his bike near his Tacoma, Washington home when Earl Shriner, having just been released from prison having just served a sentence for killing a girl, lured the boy into a wooded lot and raped, stabbed, strangled and sexually mutilated the little boy.  The boy survived.  I worked closely with that boy's mother and a handful of victims of violent, sexual crime, (myself included,) to change the laws governing violent, sexual offenders in the State of Washington in 1989.  The omnibus bill that we orchestrated and passed became the model for the rest of the country, instituting community notification, the ability to continue to incarcerate dangerous offenders after serving their time and much longer sentences for sex crimes.

I was angry.  I was beginning to spiral, having memories of my own abuse surfacing.  I even attempted to end my life.  Creating a safe community is necessary and it isn't the answer to alter the course of society.  Why I rise is because anger is not my answer.  Anger may be cathartic, but it's more of the same, dressed in a different shade.  Anger propagates anger.  I rise up to reach out and cause love, cause peace, cause education.  I rise up to cause "We are our brother's keeper."  I rise up to cause a planet where anger, rape, sexism no longer exists.  I rise up to cause a new human race.

Why I Rise - Part 29

Christine rises up with her community. She is such a great individual to have in our Salt Lake City Community! She is a beautiful soul, artist, mother, creator, friend, teacher, mentor and creative mind, among many others!
We thank her for her time as she adds her talents to our cause and creates something to be remembered!

She tells us "Why she rises..."

"In my lifetime I have felt the effects of violence towards women and girls closely, personally though the eyes of loved ones, through the eyes of an image looking back in the mirror. It has caused me many things and it has cost me many things. I have been in the car, driving in the early morning, listening to the horrors globally, stories of women raped and tortured, so recently, and I have shed tears. It is the same tears I have shed for myself, for my loved ones, for my neighbor down the street who does not know she has an ally living two houses away. It is the same tears I shed for you, and even though we have not met, we are connected in this. It will be the same tears I will shed tomorrow, when I open the paper and read the headline from a small town in another part of the world. It will happen again, over and over, again. But I will rise up. I will dance with you because I can; because when there is a community that bonds together and when, from that, there is a movement that is created, and then, liberation, there is, and always will be, hope."

Why I Rise - Part 22

I have been graced with the opportunity to be a part of One Billion Rising Salt Lake City from the ground up. I have encouraged women and men to share their stories of why they rise. But I've been fearful to write my own story. There are so many reasons why I rise that it makes it difficult to identify just one. I've written and rewritten several posts, accounting the deep dark secrets that lie in my heart, and the cobwebbed mazes of my brain. But I am realizing that the real reason that I am moved to rise - is because I can. I have a group of friends and supporters that are stronger and more supportive than I've ever had in my life. I've always been scared of being "that girl" or labeled a feminist. Guess what? I am one. I am tired of pretending that women are treated equally in hopes of being treated equally myself - it doesn't work. I will stand up and say that it is not ok to tell someone "you learned from that didn't you?" instead of "that was wrong, what he did to you is not acceptable and I stand by you."

We as women are called man-haters if we breed natural distrust and fear from being beaten & raped. But we are also playing the victim if we admit that infidelity, sexual assault and domestic violence has shaped our outlook on the world. This fear of judgment and constant minimization plays its own part in perpetuating the cycles. We don't get the help we need. We sit in the corner crying when the lives we want to live seem out of our reach because we can't control the demons in our own mind. So today, I'm breaking my own fear - and telling you why I will RISE!






I rise because it feels good.
I dance because it lifts my soul.
I strike because inequality exists, whether we choose to acknowledge it or not.





I will rise on February 14, 2013 because I didn't rise up homecoming night 2000 when I was assaulted by a friend's brother whom I had also trusted with my first kiss. When my PTSD from my early childhood became so strong that I didn't fight back. For years, I accepted this complacency and fear as guilt and my own personal culpability.

I will rise on February 14, 2013 because I never had the chance to kick the ass of the boyfriend I trusted to be my "first" who cheated on me and left before I spent 4 years, 2 surgeries and 5 biopsies to clear myself of the cancer he left as reciprocation for my trust and fidelity.

I will rise on February 14, 2013 because I didn't rise up when my 350 lb husband had difficulties with his mental illness, picked me up and threw me into a chair while I kicked and clawed and tried to escape. Only one of the many times I feared for my life in my own house. I will rise because I lived in the shadows for too long, believing my mother in law that this was my fault and I was culpable for every mistake he made, dollar he spent and his own life that he took.

I will rise on February 14, 2013 because my education is as good as those possessed by men. I studied as hard, read the same books, held a full time job and cared for my family to afford to pay as much as the men who graduated with me. I dare say I might have learned more from it, because I also had to learn how to work in groups that didn't want to "be 'the team with a girl'" when "I don't even LET my wife have a credit card, I just bought her a new minivan - she should be thanking me" was what I heard on the first day of my program.

I will dance on February 14, 2013 because on August 6, 2010 I learned what it meant to be in a community of women for the first time. As a widow at 25 I learned to trust, confide in and depend on other women to heal me, help me and share in my joy and sorrow. I learned friendship and the power of women. I have never met a more powerful and passionate group of women than those who have endured the loss of a spouse and still wake up to greet the new morning.

I will RISE STRIKE and DANCE because I am a vibrant, beautiful and strong woman who isn't about ready to take any more crap and smile and say thank you. I learned that for myself - and I want to share it with women everywhere. WE DESERVE MORE. I want to change the world so my little sister, and eventually my daughters don't have to worry about what NOT to wear so as to stay safe when they go out with friends or walk home from school. Instead I will teach my brother and my sons to treat people fairly and be cognizant of the words they use, and always stand up for what they believe. And when I remarry it will be to a partner who values my safety, who respects my voice, hears my soul and loves who I am.

If you would like to be involved with One Billion Rising please go to onebillionrising.org. If you are in the Salt Lake area please connect with us at www.obrslc.blogspot.com and www.facebook.com/obrslc. We will be DANCING on the University of Utah Campus (Feb 14th noon), we will STRIKE the Ikea Draper store with a flash mob (Feb 14th 7pm) and we will RISE with a reception to fund-raise for a great cause and connect women and those who love and support them on February 15th. Please look up the information and support us. Support me. It would mean a lot. You might be surprised how it might empower you.

With love and light,
Jess

Why I Rise - Part 19

It takes strength to find the voice to speak loud, share, and fight.
From overseas in Australia we have stories being shared with us, this a global fight. As we rise locally, we rise globally.!!!!

"My own reason for rising is because I am a survivor – I was gang raped and sexually assaulted nearly 40 years ago by 5 men I thought were friends. At 18 I was too scared and too ashamed to tell anyone, so I buried my memories and never dealt with them – and now I suffer the psychological consequences. I have never gotten over it – probably never will – but OBR and what it stands for is, for me, a hand of help and friendship that I never had 40 years ago. "

Why I Rise - Part 17

 

As a survivor of various crimes, I will rise to advocate against all types of violence and abuses. I rise for all victims of domestic and dating violence, kidnapping, human trafficking, workplace violence, rape/sexual assault, murder,and many more. I rise for HB50, the Dating Violence Protective Order Bill that will go before the Utah Legislature to protect victims of dating violence.
- Brandy Farmer

You can find more information about HB50 here: http://utahpoliticalcapitol.com/2013/01/04/flagged-bill-hb-50-dating-violence-protection-act-rep-jen-seelig/
You can contact your local representative to pledge your support for this bill if you feel as strongly as we do.

Why I Rise - Part 13

I am willing to rise up for the one billion cause being sexually abused my self when I was only 9yrs old by a guy I called my friend who was 16yrs old at a private school for all ages. I just froze and then he pulled a knife out and told me if I ever told anyone he would come and find me and hurt me. I don't remember how long before I finally told my mom but its all because of a friend that told. I needed to tell someone cause it was her cousin Daniel and he did it to her too but know one was willing to help her.

Well I finally told my mom what had happened and she got right on it. I went to counseling for a while didn't help till they but me in group counseling and heard some of the worst things from other girls, I thought to my self I didn't get it that bad and was thankful. Daniel, my sex offender, ended up just getting a slap on the hand, did some time in counseling and was thought he was cured or so they thought I don't remember how long it was when I ended running into him without him knowing who I was at a baseball game he was working at, nothing happened until a few months later my mom got the phone call that Daniel had done it again but this time he went further than he did with me and raped a girl in the janitor closet at the the baseball game.

NO MAN SHOULD EVER HAVE THAT RIGHT TO GET AWAY WITH THAT!!! I have gone the rounds of emotions with what I went through and many more incidents that challenged my life, but if wasn't for Capoeira I would never been able to get my self respect and confidence. So THANK YOU CAPOEIRA!!!

Jamie Barker
Salt Lake City, Utah

Why I Rise - Part 6

In this life we never know the cards that will be dealt.
After my parents died, I lost myself. Like a fish out of water, flopping back and forth struggling for air.
I lived back and forth, between, and above and below.
While I was still in middle school I was living with another sister of mine, it was a difficult situation. On both parts she was a young woman raising her teenage sister and how would she ever know how to do that?
She had kids of her own, but how do you deal with a 13 year old that had lost both her parents that hated and distrusted everything in life?
Unfortunately I watched myself deteriorate and even more how my sister was very submissive to her husband. My decisions that I made at the time never were smart, but regardless I made them. I was causing havoc at all costs because I felt it was the best ways to have people interact with me in my life.

It slowly yet progressively went down hill.
I never liked my sisters husband and I grew to know why. That day, I remember the weather, and the rose plants, and life.
As I was leaving to go to a friends house, I was talking with my sister as maybe I wasn’t supposed to go, my friend was walking up to me, Behind me I heard footsteps, I remember the anger in his voice and he grabbed me by my arm and lifted me up with all his might and threw me into the house.
I ran so fast crying down the road. Bruises resided and I went on my way living.
The tension only grew stronger between me and him. I was constantly told I was a failure and always reminded of what I did that made me such a horrible person.
The tension only grew stronger as I had to watch him abuse his kids, what do you do when you are 14 years old and you see your niece with a welted hand print on her chest? Or hear him yelling upstairs and the kids screaming? You cant fight back and it’s a hush hush between everyone else.
It proceeded, but the tension got so bad and I was moved.
This unfortunate situation had built me on unstable grounds. Lack of human emotion and thinking life just goes on this way. My confidence going into high school was all but there. I seeked out attention in the wrong ways.
It led to being objectified, taken advantage of, laughed at, dehumanized and petrified.
Any relationship I had seemed to be in the same: 2 years or 3 years of anger, bitter words, locking myself in the bathroom so I could get away, crying, not talking, being called a bitch, a whore,( you can fill in you adjectives),having fists and objects thrown around my head, and then waking up and pretending that I was fine.


What happened to me? I think of how powerful my mother was and how strong she was.
Who am I ? Why am I sitting here letting myself go through this?
I am not quiet anymore, and I will not be silenced anymore!
I am over the submissive me,
I am sick of watching myself being torn down
I will not let the oppressor decided my fate!



I has taken me years of finding who I am and having wonderful mentors helping me build my voice, listening to women’s stories that they so want to share with another woman. It is finding the comfort in voicing your opinion and knowing you and all women and girls have that right.
It isn’t normal to have to feel objectified, outcasted, worthless, beaten, silenced, or afraid.
I am rising for the human right that all women and girls have the right to protect their mind, body, and soul.

~A Woman Rising
Salt Lake City, Utah

*Please submit your own "Why I Rise" story to OBRSLC@gmail.com (Please include an alias if you would not like to be identified, as well as a photo of either yourself - or something you relate to)

Why I Rise- Part 1

Today is the first installation of "Why I Rise" that One Billion Rising SLC will be bringing to you. 

Everyone has a story.
Everyone has some reason that they care and are even the slightest bit impassioned for the cause.
You are important.
Your story deserves to be heard.

Here is our first story, brought to you by

 "A Lotta Living":

Please submit your own story (and a screen name if you would like to remain anonymous) to OBRSLC@gmail.com

My personal reasons for participating with One Billion Rising

I was a teen mom. When my parents found out I was pregnant at 16 it was determined that I WOULD be getting married and plans were quickly made. This was a guy who had never placed me first in any situation and treated me as if I was less than nothing. I did what was expected and we were married.

The abuse was only verbal and controlling at first. I was constantly told how ugly and terrible I was until I started to believe him. I was not allowed to go anywhere without him checking on me and accusing me of doing other things. There was constant yelling and accusations. In spite of efforts to prevent another pregnancy I was pregnant only 10 months later, I truly believe he sabotaged me and made sure I would get pregnant, what better way to control me?

The abuse became physical. He was careful to never leave obvious marks. He would hold me down, pick me up over his head, anything to let me know he was stronger than me and could do what he wanted.

I have always been a strong woman but for some reason I put up with this treatment for 2 years. When the abuse began to spread to my children, something inside me snapped and I knew there was no way that I could allow it to continue. I got out of the situation and made sure my children were not raised around this type of behavior.

I stand up and dance to bring attention to the problem, to teach women that they do have a choice and to show their abusers that we will not allow this to happen any longer. I do it for my daughters, granddaughters, nieces and friends. I do it for all women around the world who are not yet able to do it for themselves.

-A Lotta Living (Utah)

Please leave a comment with some love and support for our first guest blogger below.